power suits and funky boots

25 random things

2009-02-04T22:35:00.003+08:00

all over fb, people are writing 25 random things about themselves. i love randomness, and am excited about all the random things (about myself) that i could come up with. but am a little embarrassed to put it up on fb, so i shall write it here.

1. i used to have a stiff joint in my left thumb. i could lock my joint in place so that it'd be bent without me using muscles to hold it in position, and my friends would have great fun un-bending it. i thought it was pretty cool.

2. i live in a house with many many people, most of whom hardly talk to each other.

3. my childhood ambitions were, in order, to be a pilot, a kindergarten teacher and at twelve, to simply be a happy person. now, my dream jobs include interior designer, party planner, dressmaker, childcare centre owner, volunteer worker in south america and saver of the world.

4. i don't understand what love is.

5. my favourite foods are icecream, steamed fish, egg tofu, cabbage, and horfun.

6. i am fiercely competitive. i am also a perfectionist. to be honest to the bone, i don't like to be around people who are better than me because it makes me feel lousy about myself. but i hate it that i feel that way.

7. i psychoanalyse myself alot. to the point where sometimes i can't figure out which is the real me -- the me that comes up with the most honest and instinctive response or the me that psychoanalyzes myself.

8. once, in primary 2, i had food poisoning. and i had chicken rice and a slice of watermelon for lunch. i threw up bright red puke all over the (squat) toilet after that.

9. my dad bought me a hotdog and kickapoo for my first recess in primary 1.

10. i liked a boy called renee (i think it was pronounced as "ree-nee") when i was in kindergarten. he was the smartest and cutest boy in class. imo anyway.

11. when i was a kid, i thought that a female molester was called a molesbian.

12. the best memories of my life were of sc dance. i loved the concerts, the rehearsals, the costumes, waiting in the wings, standing on stage, the people... all of it.

13. i don't dare to be honest to myself sometimes.

14. i used to think my parents didn't love me. and i used to hate my name.

15. i used to also think that this life was but a game and the purpose of which was to kill me. i imagined that the water from the shower would turn scalding hot all of a sudden, or that someone would stab me with a knife.

16. twenty five random things is quite difficult to come up with.

17. supercalifragilisticaspialidocious. wait. that wasn't about me.

18. i struggle with God all the time. i doubt His validity, but deep down inside me i know He's here. somewhere.

19. sometimes i look into the mirror and think im ugly. other times, i think im ok.

20. i like to dance but im lousy at it.

21. i am a klutz. and i am extremely careless, messy and forgetful. ive lost my passport, and i think it was cos i threw it away.i cannot be organised for the life of me. in primary school i carried all my worksheet in one giant paper bag and would freak out whenever it was file-checking time. my work table is in a giant mess and creating files is almost an impossible task for me.

22. i screwed up my final project in my first sem in comm school. i couldn't see eye to eye with my group mates, thought that they were being racist, and insisted on my own way and opinion (yeah i know i do that alot). so i made some changes to the project when no one was looking, and ended up making a mess out of it.

23. i love being festivals co-chair! and wish it were my full time job.

24. i play this game where i'd try to make a word out of all the letters on the license plate of a random car that passes by. a more advanced level would be to make up the additional letters by coming up with a mathematical equation that gives an answer which corresponds to a letter in the alphabet.

25. i sleep alot. i think i have a sleeping disease. i can take 4 hour naps. and still be able to sleep at night.

time lines

2009-01-04T23:13:00.003+08:00

i think time is like a spiral, going round in circles yet moving forward. i think man invented time so that he could have a chance to become a better person.

imagine if we told time with a continuous straight line. there would be no opportunity to go back to where we came from, no chance to relive the moment.

but instead, time repeats itself, day after day. one, two, three, and then again, so that we have a beginning, an end, and then a new beginning. so that we can say to ourselves, this is a new day, a new year. and with a new time, comes the opportunity to restart and give ourselves another shot at life to do the things we didn't do the year before, a hope for better things to come.

happy 2009!

going off on tangents

2008-07-09T23:13:00.002+08:00

last sunday, i kissed and exchanged phone numbers with a complete stranger.

although, it wasn't a very pleasant experience.

*

and on a completely separate note, i never knew that such moronic people in the world existed.

UUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

farewell

2008-07-01T22:20:00.003+08:00

i guess my blogging about my tokyo trip won't happen. tomorrow, i start at btmice all over again. i am nervous, more nervous than i was on my first day of work.

if i disappear, it was nice knowing you and it was fun while it lasted.

wish me luck.

the stupid things that shu-en does when she travels

2008-06-27T00:05:00.003+08:00

i shall attempt to document my trip, by category rather than chronologically... and first i will start of with: the stupid things that shu-en does when she travels.

well, first of all, i did remember to pack in my phone charger but forgot to bring my phone with me. i don't wear watches, so the only source of time i had was my iPod. but, i didn't bring my iPod charger. yay.

*

day one, i touched down slightly later than we were scheduled to as the flight out of hongkong was delayed. after collecting my suitcase and figuring out where the train station was, i stood in line to purchase my n'ex and suica passes. the time was 9:30pm, there were about 5 people ahead of me, and the next trains were due to come at 9:45 or 10:15. this reminded me of the time i stood in line at the greyhound station trying to buy a ticket for a bus that was leaving in 5 minutes.

anyhow, i successfully purchased my ticket and made it to the platform by about, 9:35pm. there is a sign board that indicates that there are 2 trains approaching, one at 9:45 and the other at 10:15. shortly after, a train pulls in and i hurry to get on the train. one leg in the train and one leg still on the platform, i noticed that there was no one else getting on the train with me. i hesistate for a few moments trying to decide what was wrong with this situation, but decided that i would get on the train anyway (don't follow the crowd right!).

it was only then that i noticed on the sign board that there was a 9:42 train, which was the one that i was on and which wasn't going where i wanted to go. but before i could get off the train, the door closed on me. the train pulls in to the narita terminal 1 station and sits on the track for almost half an hour.

rewind just a bit. when the train pulled into the terminal 1 station, there was another train on the opposite tracks. 2 minutes later, there was an announcement for "ikebukuro", which was where i wanted to go. that other train was the one that i was supposed to take!! i ran towards it and the doors closed on me 2 seconds before i could get to them. thanks.

i take the local train all the way to tokyo station, drag my suitcase up a flight of steps, change trains to ikebukuro, and ultimately get in at 12:30am when if i had taken the correct train, i would have reached at 11pm. and all this while, bj and oishi-san were waiting and worrying for me at the hostel. yay again.

*

weijian comes in tuesday night. he takes the same flight schedule as me, and catches the correct train, and gets into the hostel at 11:30pm. he suggested going to the tsukiji fish market the next morning, and i said sure but we need to camp out overnight if we want to catch all the action since the trains don't start running as early as the fish market starts operating. somehow somehow, we managed to persuade 3 other people in the room to come along with us as well. we dash to the train station and made it to the platform 1 minute before the last train departed.

happy and jolly, we roamed the deserted streets of tokyo while waiting for the fish to swim to tokyo shores, hung out in a park and got to know each other better (since we really had only met each other for about an hour prior to this spontaneous random act) and drank coffee at jonathan's. we joked about how hilarious it would be if it was international fish day that day and they decided not to sell any fish.

4:30am comes, and we trot off to the fish market but noticed that there was hardly a sound. we poked our noses around and a guard came out and handed us a calendar which marked out dates that the fish market was closed. and yes, that day was one of those days. yippee yay.

*

after the fish market, we waited around for the trains to start running again so we could go back and catch some sleep. weijian and i had booked ourselves on a tour of the imperial palace at 10, which meant we had about 2 hours to sleep before we had to head out. but because i drank coffee at jonathan's at 4am, i couldn't get to sleep. yayyyyyy.

and, it took us longer to get to the imperial palace than we had expected, so we missed the tour. woohoooo!

*

perhaps, i shouldn't go on anymore.

tokyo

2008-06-24T21:37:00.003+08:00

i'd hate to admit this but i didn't enjoy myself in tokyo as much as i wish i did. it was fun, no doubt, but it wasn't enjoyable. tokyo was or is, in fact and unfortunately, rather depressing.

sure, the food was glorious, the shrines were enigmatic and the streets were buzzing with activity. i can't speak for all of japan but tokyo is at the fore front of technology, modernity and trends, yet somehow manages to retain its past and its culture, all in perfect harmony with each other. just a stone's throw away from harajuku, where teenagers hang out when dressed up in their cosplay or lolita outfits, is the austere meiji-jingu shrine. the toilets are extremely high-tech if you haven't heard already, and people are so polite and courteous that going into a department store makes you feel like queen.

the sad part is that, underneath it all is a sad, sad society. the akihabara mass killing pretty much encapsulates the state of society (and just on the news today, the grandfather who killed his entire immediate family). but also, tokyodites smoke alot and drink alot. in fact, they go to bars everyday after work. that, to me, is rather unhealthy. they hang out at pachinko parlours, slipping in 1000yen bills every 5minutes. they drink themselves silly all night until the trains start running again in the morning. there are streets and buildings dedicated to porn and various sexual fetishes. people read porn openly on trains. host clubs and hostess clubs are rampant. bums seek shelter in the subway stations and in cardboard boxes along the road at night, and lurk in the corners, abashed of their stench and unkempt looks among the young and trendy crowd, during the day.

i had a conversation with a colleague from the tokyo office, who said that tokyodites work long hours (testimony to this, i was on the train at around 11pm the first night and the trains were chokablock full of salarymen) and hardly earn enough to bring the bacon home. the traditional japanese culture of loyalty to employers and employees seem to have been thrown out of the window and there is hardly any job security since companies hire and fire without any qualms whatsoever.

every city has its fair share of problems. but the situation in tokyo seems more dire to me than in say, new york city, partly because i had held japan in such high regard in terms of social development. and walking around the streets, i was more overwhelmed by consumerism and commercialisation than culture. and i felt that all the bright lights and loud noises were merely a cover up.

faded

2008-06-07T16:48:00.002+08:00

was just looking through my old photos. such happy, youthful faces. i feel quite the opposite now. i wonder if things haven't changed much and the photos captured plastic, insincere emotions; or if i really have grown older, more jaded, in a matter of a few years.

mind your language

2008-06-04T14:23:00.006+08:00

a couple of months back, i commented on the train announcements.

they changed it again!

now the lady says "the train that is approaching platform A will terminate its service at yishun"

i think they got it right this time around =)

asset management

2008-05-28T20:44:00.002+08:00

i've decided to put a little more effort into my "beauty regime". i put that in inverted commas because currently, all i do is wash my face in the mornings and nights, and dab on some moisturizer before i head off to work. i don't think that qualifies as a beauty regime, nor a beauty regime.

realised that youth is an asset that needs some investing in less you lose it and regret it.

wandered around dfs today while waiting for my dad to pick me up. i got lost among all the brands (origins, clarins, biotherm, sephora, i dunno wat...) and the types of products (eye serum, mask, face serum, cleanser, exfoliator etc.).

i don't want to be extravagant or vain, but just enough so that im not all dried and wrinkled up when im 40? i know nuts about such stuff though, and don't have much patience either. sigh, can you get the best of all worlds (quick, affordable, effective)?

also, now that i'm working, and will probably be meeting plenty of external clients when i finally settle in to my perm deployment, i think i need to ramp up my makeup collection. all i have now is:
from cvs in charlottesville
- covergirl face powder
- l'oreal eyeshadow (black/gold, brown/pink)
- revlon eyeliner
from sephora
- urban decay eyeshadow base (cos my eye makeup always smudges, too dry/oily eyelids? strange)
from singapore
- bodyshop blush

i feel suaku. any advise?

morning rituals

2008-05-26T22:49:00.004+08:00

saigon.

the sun rises above the horizon and you are awakened not by the cock crowing nor the chirping of the birds, but the cacophony of honks from the mass of motorcycles and vans on the road. as the city awakes, roadside stalls start to set up, serving up vietnamese coffee (iced or hot), warm baguettes with your choice of pate or meatballs, or vermicelli. vehicles pull up to the roadside and stall owners have the baguette sandwiches ready beforehand for their regular customers. others sit on squat stools around tiny fold out tables and enjoy their coffee while watching the hustle and bustle of the morning traffic. you, the foreigner, observes this ritual with much interest and attempts to take part in it as well. you sip on the ice cold coffee and enjoy the sweet sensation and the bitter aftertaste. you have been initiated and you think you could live like this every morning. a motorbike carrying two huge blocks of ice, one between the rider's legs and the other behind, pulls up to the curb. you find this fascinating. the rider hauls on block onto the ground and drags it along the walkway to where the stall owner is. you look at what used to be a cup of iced coffee, now a cup of ice.

little things

2008-05-14T15:36:00.004+08:00

work can get so dull that little things will cheer you up, such as:

getting dropped off right infront of the train station
riding in a non-crowded mrt carriage
getting a seat on the train
a good novel and fifteen minutes to read it
not having to wait for the greenman at the cross junction
not having to wait too long for the bus to arrive
tehcsiudai in the mornings
less spicy korean beef ramen
purple coloured agar agar
tea breaks
weekend plans
telecommuting
public holidays
music while at work
five minute foozeball

feeling accomplished

2008-05-06T21:31:00.004+08:00

things have been looking up =)

after having been abroad for 2 years, i cant seem to be able to stay in one place for too long. i've booked myself an air ticket to tokyo in june (whoopppeee!!) and will also be heading to vietnam with the family a couple of weekends from now. yay im a jetsetter globetrotter backpacker nutttt. the idea of just being out of this tiny little country that i try so hard to persuade others to visit on a daily basis excites me.

i went down to smu the other day. caderas is setting up an alumni, so we had a little meeting. got to see lots of people that i havent seen in a long time! including benkoh. time for meetups and catchups!

speaking of which, vinny dude is back in singapore so i am forseeing several prata nights. unfortunately, most of the dudes will be overseas doing something or other, and so i don't think there will be a karaoke session. but i have been getting more than the usual dosage of KTV since starting work so that's ok ;)

we met up last saturday to celebrate yong's birthday. my alcohol tolerance seems to have decreased significantly. oh! what happened to all the training that i went through in the US?? i had 2 frozen margaritas (tiny cups too) and threw up my unagi rice burger and nachos one hour later. this only means one thing: i need more training!

i have also started spanish lessons. had my second one yesterday. im still very lost and i couldn't say something even if i had to.. ok well i can say good morning, and good night, and hello gorgeous (yes that last one is very important and useful aye).

i like making lists of things that i am doing/have done. at least im not sitting at home rotting away so much anymore. been reading, although not the economist. ive already accumulated a backlog with those. they just seem to keep on coming before you can even get halfway through the previous issue. seems to me to be a conspiracy of some sort! between who, i don't know, but definitely against me.

and, i went to the gym today (i did take a 2 week break though) and ran a full 30min, 4km! not very fast, but im slowly slowly creeping towards the half marathon target in december.

hooray for me being hardworking and making things happen! =)

ps: go here, select any country, and click on the marina bay weekends banner. its one of the projects which i did some work on! =) although i didnt do much, and the process of getting it done was a pain in the butt and rather ugly, it feels kinda nice to have your work up on the world wide web with millions of people (ok i exaggerate) viewing it.

2008-04-29T21:35:00.002+08:00

i feel like screaming f***

i hate hate hate hate hate hate hate... all of this.

but, i did get a flower delivery today. =)

overhaul and revamp

2008-04-17T23:43:00.003+08:00

march 31, i made a list of things i needed to work on:

read the news, and literature
learn something, a language or a skill
pick up a sport, or some type of exercise
keep in touch with my friends
spend more time at home

since then, ive made some progress on some:

1. purchased a subscription for the economist. while i have yet to read an entire issue, some is better than none? although, i have come to realise that i don't like the style and voice that the economist adopts. i also started on memoirs of lee kuan yew, which i have since abandoned for 1984. will get back to mr lky shortly.

2. enquired about violin lessons, which are bloody expensive. considering learning spanish. after some thought, i've decided that i might like to work for the UN World Tourism Organisation eventually, and thought perhaps knowing some spanish might land me up in south america. but still thinking. the other option was continuing with salsa.

3. made it to the gym twice this week and once last week, and am slowly getting back my stamina and loving it! targeting for the standard chartered half marathon in december. yes, im still up for it. woooot!

4. im meeting up with cherie this saturday. i last saw her... in january. and i initiated it too. yay! brownie points for me! and planning on a trip to japan in june to visit the ex-roomie and bj. just keeping my fingers crossed that it will eventually work out.

5. been spending more time with the grandma and talking more nonsense to her. sometimes, i just sit next to her and read a book, but i guess just having someone accompany her is enough for her. she is feeling much better too and is even able to walk some.

i guess, all in all, i've been making good progress. just need to keep it up, and work harder on 2 and 4. would like to also get involved in some charity work and have registed with nvpc.

work's been slow but its gradually starting to come in, so i guess things have been improving on that front too.

cheers to a new and improved life! one more thing i need to work on, is getting my photos uploaded promptly. it is such a chore though, on this broken laptop and lousy internet connection!

part three: hamilton and two

2008-04-06T22:22:00.005+08:00

we weren't sure of where we were going from memphis. so we hit the highway and when the sun had set, we stopped at the nearest town, hamilton, where we spent the night.

dinner at oh!bryan's. the chimney was smoking and lots of truckers were parked upfront when we drove past!

steak and onion rings, catfish and hushpuppies for dinner

the next day, we explored the town a little, and found piggly wiggly's!

heading out of hamilton, we weren't quite sure of which direction to go...

pulled up at a sketchy diner for lunch just on the edge of the town

where i had a greasy burger and tater tots. the waitress was astonished when she heard i didn't know what tater tots were. boo.

detoured to natural bridge..

this is what an indian face looks like (the plant! not the person)

puddle

under the natural bridge

since we had visited one bridge that day, we thought we'd might as well visit another one

the last covered bridge in cullman county

feeling like the king of the world

to be continued...

part two: walking in memphis

2008-04-06T21:41:00.007+08:00

and finally.. more pics from the december road trip! (i know, very very slow la)

all excited to be hitting the road

we got lost, and look where we ended up at!

sunset in memphis on christmas day

elvis' abode in graceland

possibly the oldest department store around

a peek inside a.schwab

lost and found in the store

we found treasure!

sun studio, where elvis' path to fame and glory started

sweet! red velvet and chocolate cupcakes

the road out of memphis leads to southpark

nothing and somethings

2008-03-31T21:25:00.002+08:00

extra idle today because i am a sickiee. fine dining at dolce vita on friday left my taste buds tingling but my stomach rumbling. it turned into occassional bouts of gastric pains on saturday and sunday. i had ruled out gastritis since i had not missed a single meal, or even crumb, past few weeks, and had considered perhaps heart burn, stomach flu, stomach ulcers.. worms?

the doctor dumbed it down to gastritis and excess wind this morning, and dashed all my hopes of a big hoo haa full body check-up, x-rays, and whatever scans that exist in the world of medicine today. gave me 4 types of pills to choke on and a day off from work. woohoo i was delirious! but i ended up writhing in bed (or maybe just rolling about in my sleep) most of the day as the pains got worse and evolved itself into diarrhoea as well.

ok, im a wuss. its just gastric, no need for a press conference. anyhows, the reason for narrating my uninteresting, unexciting lack-of-a-story, was to say, that i have alot of time on my hands today and hence i'm writing another post!

inspired by the bucket list, the idea of it but not the movie since i have not watched it (especially with the increase in movie ticket prices!), i am of the thought that i should do more with my life than work, and sleep. of course, chances are i won't get down to doing even half of them, but making the list and checking it twice is half the battle won?

and so, here it is...

read the news, and literature
learn something, a language or a skill
pick up a sport, or some type of exercise
keep in touch with my friends
spend more time at home

okay, not much of a list, but work and sleep do take up alot of my time already so i think its pretty ambitious, what i've come up with.

grandma suffered a fall sometime last year and injured her spine, which put additional pressure on her knees. that made walking difficult and painful for her, so she did minimal of it. as a result of her inactivity, her legs started to swell due to water retention, which made movement even more challenging. we've been having to move her around the house on a wheelchair, and she doesnt do much all day except watch tv, most of which she doesn't really understand anyway. it just seems like she's just waiting for time to pass, and for the time to come.

she's eighty-something, and it is a fact of life that everyone has to pass on someday. but im just realising that that day is going to come sooner than i can expect it, or that i want it. and its scary.

i think im at a point in my life where im realising how i live, the decisions i make now, will affect what my life will be like in future. and im not ready to be responsible for myself.

mathematics

2008-03-30T19:07:00.002+08:00

the dust has settled. things are back to normal, although i'm not quite sure what normal means. life seems to come at me in waves and tides; and at its peak i seem to be struggling for breath but during the lull i yearn to be running the adrenalin race again. one can never be satisfied.

but you know where the median, the perfect fit, is when at any point in time, that is the one and only place you find rest and solace in.

certainly though, the median is not the norm.

day one: atlanta

2008-01-27T22:28:00.000+08:00

look who's up to no good

breakfast at ihop - two eggs, two pancakes, two sausages, two strips of bacon, all gone

creatures in the georgia aquarium

an unsolvable puzzle

2008-01-23T23:22:00.000+08:00

i dreamt that my colleague was pregnant for twenty years and gave birth to a twenty-year old "baby". my question was, does a twenty-year old baby act like a baby or act like a twent-year old?

going down south

2008-01-20T21:28:00.000+08:00

its approximately one thousand five hundred miles from atlanta to memphis down to birmingham and then further south to fort rucker.

along the way, we saw giant fish in the georgia aquarium, picnicked by little rock falls, made detour to rome, missed the unclaimed baggage centre, witnessed a mesmerizing sunset, travelled back 150 years in the a.schwab department store, ran away from rednecks, discovered tater tots in a trucker diner, slept in a victorian room with a bed full of fluffy pillows, fought a war at the civil rights institute, got snubbed at by a peanut depot, ruined (or worsened) the reputation of chinks at a quaint little town, got snubbed at by a flea market, tasted the best barbeque burger out of a wagon, and had a fantabulastic time. all in a matter of ten days.

for new year's eve dinner, we had enough food to feed 6 boys (or men, whichever), 2 girls, and plenty of leftovers. and we ushered in 2008 with a blast, literally, with 2 hours worth of explosives.

for the next few days, i mother-ed and maid-ed 3 pilots. i made breakfast (and burnt bagels), made lunch (and burnt ketchup), made dinner (and burnt the bottom of the pot), made horfun and char siew wanton mee and fried rice and red rubies and meat-patty-lookalike mint cookies and a huge mess. i drowned gummy bears in blue jello and cleaned the toilet and folded the laundry. and watched 3 whole days of america's next top model modelthon. i shopped at the factory outlet and i shopped at target and i shopped at walmart.

going down south was indeed an adventure =)

[pictures another time, blogger is being uncooperative today]

the party i did not go to

2007-12-17T23:50:00.001+08:00

'twas the night of heroes, villians and victims. my evil twin sister poisoned me and caused me to go into a coma for the night. she took over and went for our annual dinner & dance in my place.

evidence of the damage she did:

the girls - evil discipline mistress, injured damsel in distress saved by the fireman, sexy nurse, hot jailbird, naughty student, kinky police woman, and my evil twin sister as the bikerchick prison warden

the boys - hunkydory fireman, mad doctor, sneaky burglar

partners in crime

the mad doctor attending to the mad patient

check out the tattoo.. how bad ass!

clearly, it wasn't me at the d&d. but based on the photos, im sure it was great fun.

platform 9 and 3/4

2007-12-10T21:50:00.000+08:00

maybe im slow, but have you realised that they have re-recorded the announcements in the train stations? they now say "if you notice any suspicious persons or articles, please inform our staff or dial 999."

they've also changed the message "the train arriving at platform A terminates at yishun" to "the train arriving at platform A will terminate at yishun". when i first heard it, i thought, ooh they've been playing something that was grammatically incorrect for so long. but then i thought about it and i couldn't decide if either was wrong, or if one was "more correct" than the other.

and i thought about it further, and i realised that if you wanted to be really picky about it, both were incorrect because technically, it isnt the train but the train service that terminates. right? because if the train did indeed terminate, it would be very expensive to run the train service since they'd have to make new trains all the time.

but then again, it wouldn't really make sense to say "the train service that is approaching platform A will terminate at yishun", would it?

two big candles and two small ones

2007-12-09T21:44:00.000+08:00

dang. i can no longer claim that im 21 and have people say to me "you're so young!" i wish i could stay young for forever and never grow up. unfortunately, time will continue to tick whether there are batteries in the clock or not.

so on the friday before the birthday, the bunch decided it would be fun to make me go on a scavenger hunt, on my own, while carrying a laptop and wearing three inch heels, all over town, while they happily took the train down to the final destination together and sat there munching on fries and cheese sticks while waiting for me to appear, if i ever did.

meiyan left me an envelope, which was only to be opened at 5:57pm.

following that, i received several other clues via sms that would eventually lead me to blu jazz at haji lane. grrr make me walk so much when i cld have taken the bus straight from the office.

and as much as i grumble now, i was secretly extremely pleasured by the torture i was put through *haha*. thank you alll for the *suspense*, the planning, the surprise and of course, the present. the vintage doctor leather bag i had been eyeing from my last shopping trip. yayeh!!

the next morning, i woke up and found a lovely little surprise waiting downstairs for me!

a gorgeous bouquet of roses

and a giant box filled with giant cupcakes that make you grin along with them!

as much as birthdays are crappy things since they serve as reminders that you're getting older, birthdays are happy things too because people shower you with lots of love (even if they are really just out to reemphasize that you are OLD)!

thank you all for the birthday wishes!

kitkat

2007-12-08T10:47:00.001+08:00

i need a time out.

two more weeks and counting down.

one-der

2007-12-06T22:17:00.000+08:00

i wonder

full of wonder

wonderful

a wonder

wonder.

two cents

2007-11-20T23:01:00.001+08:00

when i was perhaps four, my mum found a strand of white hair on my head. i tried to rationalize it and said, "its because i think too much."

during my formative years in sc dance, i remember mrs chan said to me, there's nothing wrong with being a perfectionist. her statement implied to me that being perfectionistic has negative connotations and i thought, why would there be something wrong with wanting to be good at whatever you do?

i find myself being very cautious of what impressions people have of me. no doubt it's important to be confident of yourself and to not let comments by others affect you, but i feel, no man is an island and alot of who you are is made up of how others perceive you.

if you live by your own set of rules, and if those rules aren't aligned with that of society's, then your rules don't apply. for example, if you think dressing skimpy is a non-issue because it is your own body you are exposing and you have the right to wear what you wish, but society feels you are imposing on others, should you continue to do as you will? however, if all of society indulges in thievery and prostitution, does that make such "ills" acceptable?

i fear that the people around me smile at me and throw daggers behind my back. i fear that people speak ill of me when im not around and say sweet nothings to my face. i'd rather people be direct with me and honest to me about my faults, because to me it shows that they care enough to let me know my weaknesses.

i think being perfectionistic can be debilitating.

*

im not quite sure where i meant for this to go. i thought i had a point to make. my mind is somewhat of a tangled mess, but i'd better not try too hard to sort it out, less i find more than a strand of white hair.

ding dong bell

2007-11-17T22:11:00.000+08:00

[blogger's been acting up on me and won't let me upload photos with their thingamajig, and i can't seem to resize pics on photobucket so don't mind them giant sized and cropped out]

so much for being disciplined all last month. ive busted too much of this month's pay cheque already, and it's only been a week =( but the nonsense that i bought makes me happy =DDDD

and presenting to you....

my bus earrings!

and my steals from yesterday's trip to chinatown...

pig ring and rose ring

a fine line

2007-11-15T22:15:00.000+08:00

if anorexia involves a distortion of your body image which leads you to think that you are fat when you're actually stick thin, is there a disorder where by you think you're thin when you're actually fat?

busybusybeeeee

2007-11-13T23:18:00.001+08:00

been meaning to post all last week but blogger has been very uncooperative and isn't allowing me to upload photos.

just after i said my social life was severely lacking, i had a bumper crop week of social activities, making me one very happy girl!

florence came over on thursday and we baked cinnamon oatmeal raisin cookies and carrot cake. we brought them to work on friday and received pretty good feedback from everyone, although im not sure how much of it was them being polite and kind.

on friday, the girls-whose-boyfriends-were-unavailable-for-various-reasons hung out together. we made up for the lack of boys by going to geylang (????) -- just kidding. i insisted we be "adventurous" and go somewhere "inaccessible" because peimin had the car. us three small girls (2 small in length, 1 small in width) devoured a chilli crab, a giant plate of horfun, dou miao and a D24 durian. awesomeness =)

had dinner with the cell group on saturday. i paid 4.50 for korean maggi mee. no matter how hard i tried to pretend i wasn't eating instant noodles, it looked and tasted exactly like it. and so i was kind of very sour about it. plus i had some kimchi too. after dinner, we ventured to selegie for the supposedly famous (although ive never heard of it myself) tau huay.

took a break on sunday because all this socializing was making me so tired! haha.

i conned meiyan and florence into going shopping with me after work on monday. after all, it was pay day and i was in a rare spend-money mood. the harvest included a tent dress, BUS earrings which are absolutely HILARIOUS, and almost almost a brown vintage leather doctor-bag. i was disappointed i didn't get to buy the bag, but satisfied with the rest of my purchases.

today, florence and i gymed and then put on back the calories at genki sushi. we might have lost it again with all that talking. and tomorrow, i am meeting dear liying whom i havent seen since first semester at UVA for dinner.

woohooo i am miss popular girl! haha!

the funky chinaman

2007-11-07T22:30:00.000+08:00

musings

2007-11-06T22:04:00.000+08:00

i took a day's mc yesterday. i wonder if my boss sees it as a sign of weakness or incompetence. i wonder if what she thinks of me is important. i guess it is. but i wonder why another human being's opinion of you should matter so much.

it was a good, much needed recuperation session. i slept for the most part, starting saturday night. had maybe forty hours of sleep in two-half days. something ridiculous like that. and in the few hours that i actually managed to stay awake, i made black bottomed cupcakes, and plain chocolate ones. both of which weren't very successful. even after distributing some in the office, i still have tons of them sitting on the table with no idea what to do with them.

besides that, nothing much has been going on in my life. my time seems to be spent 50% on work, 40% on sleep, 10% on social time. which is quite very sad. my salsa class has ended. someones keeps trying to ask me out, and i didnt know how to say no too many times so i just didnt respond, which is rather rude and awkward. im thinking of taking up a violin class or something something. aanddd, the best part of my lack of a social life, is, that im booked to go to the US of A (the ATL no less) from the 22nd to the 8th. wheeeheeee.

crossword

2007-10-24T23:12:00.000+08:00

when the other end of the carrot is a stick, what are you to do?

and what do you do when you make mistakes that are irrevocable and damaging?

would you choose to see a beautiful fantasy, or the ugly reality?

reality tv

2007-10-23T18:55:00.000+08:00

i forget all the time that in this world, the people are not friends but competitors and judges. they aren't in your team, they don't race alongside you. and for everything you do, you are measured. even as a person. you can't show emotion, frustration, vulnerability, or it will be deemed as incompetence.

fingerprints

2007-10-22T21:18:00.000+08:00

i finally got around to uploading my europe photos on facebook yesterday. as i reminisced on my amazing three weeks eurotripping, i felt like life the way it is now isn't life at all. and today, i had a conversation with kenneth about what we hope to achieve when we turn 60 and my conclusion was that, at the end of the day, your material and career achievements don't count for anything. its your personal relationships that you will be remembered for. and yet, during the journey, money and power and status will matter.

i miss the beauty, the freedom, and the simplicity in the world i used to see.

double O

2007-10-17T21:31:00.001+08:00

today, my lianrong bao rolled onto the floor, and a chocolate donut landed on my table.

magic happens =)

*

today, i met with my director and while using my laptop to discuss some work with her, 3 people came online on msn. ding. ding. ding.

playthings

2007-10-14T20:58:00.000+08:00

i saw him again today after so long. it was a brief passing but it didn't fail to put a smile on my face. sweet memories. everything was same old, same old, except me. the rusty blue van, gardenia bread and chocolates, his big belly and droopy eyes. i remember anxiously waiting to hear his horn blast rhythmically, grabbing my little purse and dashing towards the sound of his horn. i'd buy whatever my leftover pocket money allowed me - i liked super rings and rollercoaster the best. as the years went by, the sound of his horn gradually faded as i grew up and was no longer excited by simple things like that.

i smiled today because i was glad an old tradition was still intact, that his business was doing well enough to subsist him for so long, that i hadn't forgotten.

a wrinkle in time

2007-10-13T00:19:00.000+08:00

its the end of the second week and im starting to feel a little jaded.

i think i should just sit in a corner.

recuperation

2007-10-08T21:21:00.000+08:00

i think work takes so much out of me that im basically have no energy left to do anything during the weekend.

hung out with the mts after work on friday since we need our ever-so-frequent dose of each other. i imagined ourselves ten years down the road, or maybe twenty, in our power suits sitting around the same table at cedele, sharing a couple of sandwiches, maybe with a couple more wrinkles, but still being as silly as ever. it was a nice thought. not the wrinkles part though.

i was hardworking on saturday. went for a swim and did my targeted 25 laps. its an odd number cos i always lose count so i do something between 24 and 26. was rather annoyed cos i like to take the time to just zone out, feel weightless, clear my head. but saturday mornings are filled with kids swimming in pajamas and white bodied men looking lecherous and blocking the sides cos all they do is stand around to talk. seriously, its kinda gay (not in the sexual tendency sense but the not-very-macho-but-lame sense). if u want to swim, swim. if u want to see each other near naked and chat, go somewhere else.

anyhow, was pretty good the rest of the day too. took a nap after the swim, went for cell, then had dinner at uno beef house at toa payoh. sirloin steak for 10 bucks - it was so huge i only managed to finish 3/4 of it. medium-rare was more like, medium-well though. not top grade stuff, but for 10 bucks it was alright. came home early and cleared my work. you'd think i was some big shot high up in the food chain with all the OT and work that i was bringing home to do. but im just doing small fry shit.

i skipped salsa on sunday cos i was busy NAPPING. gee. but to make up for it, i went to phoon huat to buy some ingredients and i baked some chewy chocolate chocolate chip cookies. i miss the days where i would try a different recipe every weekend (so that somebody would have cookies to eat during the week).

brought the cookies to work!

i need to make my life more interesting. none of that boring mediocre life nonsense!

symptoms

2007-10-05T23:03:00.000+08:00

signs you are a workaholic:

it's the first week of work, and you have stayed in the office past go home time.

it's the first week of work, and you're willing to skip lunch to do your work.

you think about the work that needs to be done even in your sleep.

you talk about the work that needs to be done while on a shopping trip.

you don't feel hungry or tired while working. but you feel like you could eat a horse or fall asleep immediately the moment you reach home.

you get up before the alarm rings.

it's the first week of work, and you've brought home work to do over the weekend.

it's a friday night, and you plan to do the work you brought home.

it's the first week of work, and you're thinking about sacrificing social and family life for the rest of your life. but thank goodness it's just a thought.

the word work appears 12 times in a blog post of 172 words.

the second first

2007-10-01T21:42:00.000+08:00

i've offically joined the ranks of the corporate rats. although, im not sure if i can call me 'corporate' since im in the public sector. but i guess btmice is as "private sector" as it gets around here.

the first day of work saw me getting up earlier than before. the morning routine was pretty much the same, save for the fact that i had to remind myself that i was going to an office. no more uniforms. somehow i still ended up in a dress that some felt was too short, although no doubt they all agreed that it was longer than the one i wore on the first day. oh what a reputation i established for myself!

got to work on the dot and was ushered to my new office. i was feeling rather jittery, especially after having heard things. i didnt have a space to sit cos meiyan snatched the table that my boss had specially cleared for me on saturday (tsk!), so i put up at another colleague's desk since she was on leave. was introduced to everyone in the department and then my AD briefed me about what the btmice group does. information overload.

i met with the boss after lunch and she asked me what i wanted to do. and i somehow cleverly landed myself with a bid report to do up for a conference that was due in 2 weeks. i suspect my buddy wasn't too happy with me cuz cluster development (the department we are in under btmice) doesn't do bids. so this was additional, out-of-scope work for him. but oh well, im excited cuz the results will be out while im still around and i can see the fruits (or lack of) my labour real soon!

the orchard mts met up for dinner after work (we cant go a day without seeing each other!) and we exchanged details about our new postings. everyone seems to be doing pretty cool stuff. yay!

my real initiation is tomorrow when i receive my laptop. then work officially begins. wish me luck!

friends

2007-09-30T20:20:00.000+08:00

today is the in-between day. the three months at the svc ended yesterday, and tomorrow marks the start of another four and a half months at btmice. what can i say, as unprepared as i may be, tomorrow and the rest of my life will come gushing at me before i know it.

i've learnt alot through meeting and greeting, answering queries from tourists and locals, fam trips to the zoo and night safari and what seemed like too many fam trips to clarke quay, handling complaints and talking to the more experienced senior guides.

but more importantly, i've gotten to know great people in the course of having daily cups of teh-c siu dai from toast box, dancing on the podium, singing karaoke, visiting the famed shoe shop at that particular mall and thinking of ingenuous ways to kill time on a saturday night while sitting in the dim lights at the duck tours counter. the word 'colleague' scares me so i shan't call them that. more than that, seeing each other five days a week, having lunch and dinner, and sharing our dirty little secrets during our idle time have made us friends. and from them i've learnt about important life lessons such as beauty regimes and products, the latest fashion trends (e.g. fish nets and suspenders), how to get extremely excited about tofu, and dating.

and while we will each be assigned our own desk with our own laptop, and split into different departments, im looking forward to lunches, dinners, bitching and whining and teasing sessions, shopping trips, parties and more get togethers.

the red people

all ready to paint the town red

i love you guys to bits!